I’m bit of a life begins at the end of your comfort zone kinda gal. I like challenges, I like to be challenged and I like to challenge. So good luck to those potential suiters out there haha. But in all seriousness, I believe that with challenging ourselves, comes growth, and from that comes real living.
People quite often say to me, you’re so confident or you’re so brave, how are you not nervous, or my favourite; it’s ok for you, you’re strong or you’re this or that. Well, I haven’t always been, and I’ve had to work on myself really hard to get to where I am. And I do get nervous! All the bloody time! But I always challenge myself to learn to channel or manage those nerves, or learn a bit more about my anxiety triggers, releases and coping mechanisms. And I improve, each time I feel it and face it, I grow and improve.
I’m very human. I’m absolutely shitting myself when I start a new job or go to an event where I don’t know anyone or take up a new hobby where I might make an absolute fool of myself. All of which I have done this past year and am currently in the middle of doing again to start the new year. And sure, I’d love to can it all and go snuggle my dog on my couch, deep inside my comfort zone. BUT I don’t. I feel the fear and do it anyway. And I level up, I get a bit braver and I get better at it each time. (and then I get to snuggle my dog on my couch haha)
I have consciously made an extra effort to get outside my comfort zone in the last 2 years. Along with working on self-integrity; Following through with things I say I want to or will do, turning my dreams into achievements. Starting with finally seriously applying to get into the fire brigade, and every step of that journey has been scary as shit! Haha. I don’t know how many days during rookies I thought about how nervous I was and how far out of my comfort zone I was. Not to mention relocating to the far far far north west and starting life on station. New town, new job, new house, new gym, new friends, new coffee shops, new journey. New everything! But that stuff all kind of comes with the territory of being lucky enough to land my dream job. Which in turn has made me better and braver at challenging myself in my personal life.
Next up was turning my long-time pipe dream of getting back on a dirt bike into reality. The planets aligned, and the opportunity arose. I jumped. I jumped straight out of my comfort zone and onto a bike and became a beginner at something again. When you have good people around you that tend to live with those same beliefs, it makes it that bit easier to do crazy shit, and to feel supported in your endeavours. Every time I jump on my bike, I have to push myself to get out of my comfort zone, whether it’s going on a huge adventure into the desert with a couple of very experienced riders; or joining a skills day with a couple of the country’s top moto x and enduro riders; or just getting up the courage to try jumps, again and again. Even just being ok with the possibility of injury, every person has a story about why they quit, or their close calls, or why it’s dangerous. They might be right, and are definitely entitled to their opinion, but if you let the opinions and stories of others shape the way you live, you’ll be forever selling yourself short.
That’s what I remind myself, every time things come along that challenge my mind. Like this writing business. This opening up to the world about me, this laying things on the line that might be judged and critiqued. Sure, it might take my sister to give me a stern shove and a deadline, but I do it, and I get nervous, but I enjoy it, so I do it again. Or even taking a break from my sport. May seem weird to some of you, may resonate with some of you that love your sport and competing. The decision to step away for a while, to honour the break that your body and mind is screaming for and focus on improving other areas of your life takes way more courage than signing up for any comp or pushing through and keeping on grinding. What if I don’t get back? What if I drop far behind the pack? What if I don’t keep up with the strong girls, who are all progressing while I’m having a time out? What if I miss out on so much? What if……….Oh wait, What about everything I could gain?
I’m more than just a competitor. I’m more than what I lift. I am the one with the pen in my hand to write my future however I want. So if I’m working on being better to myself, bettering myself and growing in different ways, then the what ifs don’t matter. What matters is, was I alive? Like really living. Was I loving it, being kind, living true to my values, giving back and am I happy? That’s a big f*ck Yes from me. I hope you find your important heck yes in 2020. It’s time to level up again!